.

Chatting

POSTING

Kepada sesiapa yang ingin menghantar komen-komen pada sesuatu "posting", sila klik pada tajuk yang hendak dilihat. dan anda akan melihat secara langsung dan khusus kepada tajuk berkenaan. ini akan memudahkan anda menghantar komen. komen-komen yang dihantar hendaklah bersih daripada isu sensitiviti dan tidak menyalahi undang-undang. Pihak moderator tidak akan bertanggungjawab sebarang risiko dan berhak memadam sebarang komen yang dirasakan perlu tanpa sebarang notis. Sebarang pertanyaan dan kemusykilan sila berhubung kepada moderator.

Sekian,

Sunday, March 30, 2008

~WHAT CHINESE THINKS OF MALAYS~

getting update...
1. You MALAY call each other 'BODOH' for fun, and too 'BODOH' to realize it's an offensive word.

2. You're the LAZIEST person on God's earth.

3. Always update with "lagu-lagu A-minor", "lagu-lagu rindu" and "wayang hindustani".

4. Always give a very long honourable speech start from Duli Yang Maha Mulia, Tan Sri, Puan Sri, YB-YB, Yang Berbahagia Datuk, Datuk-Datuk, Datin-Datin, Tuan Haji, Tuan Pengerusi Majlis.. and last sometime least...."rakyat jelata" sekalian......."terlebih dahulu saya ingin membuka majlis dengan asalamualaikuwaramatulahiwabarakatu......"

5. Many Malay ended at "pusat pemulihan dadah" for common drug abuse.

6. "Air sirap" is the cheapest drink you can afford.

7. You like to tease and act perverted when someone with sexual appeal passing by.

8. You self proclaimed from a superior race (Arabs).

9. You love to eat, especially FREE FOOD.

10. Malay favourite quote = REZEKI JANGAN DI TOLAK.

11. Malay least favourite word = JANJI MELAYU.

12. Your girls got a mouthfull of chicken's ass (loudmouths).

13. You can't stand it and always keep on staring at someone who are better dressing / looking rather than your back-dated looks.

14. You wear your shirt more than 4 times before wash it.

15. You feel it's not right to eat first before everybody gets their meal (while your meal is getting cold).

16. You got that annoying habit of wanting people to acknowledge you.

17. You know for the fact that you are supersticious (bomohs and dukuns).

18. You know for the fact that Malay jokes are decently lame and you always force yourself to laugh when other malay joker telling their lame jokes.

19. You always try to take advantage on other people work..

20. You are trained to be a sweet talker.

21. You love to offer drinks to your boss while polishing his shoe.

22. You always pick on juniors.

23. You don't care if everyone in your class/office know for the fact that you are lazy.

24. You are very protective on your seniority.

25. You are quite a slow thinker.

26. You prefer to borrow people's stuff rather than buy it, but hardly return it back.

27. You also always use other's property without asking permission.

28. Many of you are not sincere when making friend with non-malays.

29. You always waste your time in the public phone talking about "janji-janji manis", "omong- omong kosong", "aku hidup dalam blues", "Hindi superstar" and "cinta-sayang". (these are direct quotes...)

30. Malay most popular ambition... * to the public = "ingin menjadi seorang insan yang berguna" * in reality = to be a clerk, despatch, factory worker

31. Gossip are number 1 favourite past time.

32. Malay favourite magazine are URTV, Mangga, Jelita, Remaja and Variasari.

33. Mark as "bangsa pendengki" by other race in Malaysia.

34. When someone giving a speech, a Malay usually will nod their head (kepala terangguk-angguk) not to show that they understand, but just simply to act that they understand in a serious manner.

35. Deep in the eyes of Malay, the meaning of "TERSIPU-SIPU BAHASA" and "MALU-MALU KUCING" are..... * GREAT APPETITE WITH A VENGEANCE.

36. Malay got less friend from other races because... * Malay are too proud of their own language which makes them stuck-up * Malay also ignore that other etnic groups and foreign people are willing to learn to speak in Malay while got other knowledge in other language. (so now you know why this email is written in ENGLISH)

37. In Malaysia, people said "wear condom and don't forget to take a bath with Dettol if you make love to a Malay".

38. An example of a Malay with good grades =STRAIGHT C-MINUS

39. A Malay boss are known as * intimidating his staff * Sexual harrasing & Blackmailing * Welcome more family member and friends to join the company * Corruption * Always bring company's item home for personel use.

40. Malay, as the biggest population in Malaysia, are always feels threaten with the minority Christian in the country.

41. Malay chicks always dream to have sex with White Man but always ended get f*ck by their own species. (Im sorry if this offended you, but it was a promise)

42. Most babies found in the bushes and dustbin are Malay.

43. Most adultery/incest cases are by Malay.

44. Most divorce cases are by Malay couple.

45. Most yuppie wannabes are Malay.

46. Malay man got the habit using sink/wash hand area to rinse and wash their penis mostly in their bathroom, hostel and also in the public toilet.

47. Malay love to make fun at people who use toilet paper to wipe ass because they love to touch their sh*t with their hand.

48. Malay knows that other races could not dare to eat malay food not because of the spices but because the food was process by their ass-wiping-hand.

49. Malay use toilet paper in Malay restaurant / food court / warung to wipe customer's mouth and hand.

50. A typical malay Ready-to-wear..... * a long, torn jeans, * a T-shirt * a pair of loafers

51. Malays can't live without rice and chilli.

52. A malay who check in a foreign hotel will cook their food inside the hotel room with water boiler and a portable mini cooker to save cost.

53. Malay knows their favourite fast food......KENTUCKY FRIED CHICKEN hot and spicy.

54. Malay will eat fried chicken and burger just like in the manner of eating rice with hand "one hand lean on the table, slouching head to the plate and other hand with finger close to each other to enter mouth".

55. Malay toilet always smells like "petai".

56. Malay love to remind people to have their morning shower but they themself always ended up having a BO in the afternoon. (BO=body-odour)

57. Backstabbing are malay greatest asset.

58. Cheating in examination or test are heredity.

59. Malay favourite brand are G.A Blue Jeans, Lady-like Jeans, a fake Ray-ban.

60. Upper class Malay favourite brand are the cheapest Versace t-shirt, Malboro Classic sometimes fake sometimes not jeans, an old fashion (erik estrada CHIPS) Ray-Ban glasses and a discount sales Mark and Spencer.

61. Weekend are racing paradise for "Mat Motor".

62. Malay never learn to accept people's opinion as a giude or challenge.

63. You feel that you had to support Moslem terrorist just because their are Islam and not because their are a serial killers.

64. Malay favourite living concept = BIAR PERUT KOSONG ASALKAN RUMAH CANTIK MACAM ISTANA.

65. The only musical instrument you can play is a GITAR KAPOK.

66. You Malay will pretend to ignore and deny that you are typical.

67. You MALAYS dreaming to become rich, but not by hard working or studying BUT with ALL KINDS OF SKIM CEPAT KAYA and STUPID MULTI-LEVEL MARKETING BUSINESS.

68. Dont have money but always want to action - buying cars like Waja, Wira and other expensive cars while you know you can only afford a KAPCAI.

69. Parents very rich but still go overseas using govenment scholarship. Go overseas to enjoy and not to study.

70. You will start to wondering about yourself after reading this.




*Haiya is it true??

~The Ah Kau Story~

getting update...
Ah Kau is a guy who sells newspaper every morning next to your apartment, and you are one of his daily regular customers. Before dashing off to your office every day, you will go to his small stall and buy The Star newspaper. Wearing a newly pressed shirt, a tie, and a pair of Clarks shoes, you grab a copy of The Star, pay RM1.20 and exchange smiles with Ah Kau and greet him.
“Apa macam Ah Kau ini hari? Bisnes ada baik?”
The normal greeting like you do every day. Yes, Ah Kau doesn’t speak English. He speaks Chinese and knows a little bit of Malay. He speaks a little bit of Malay but with a very thick Chinese accent.
“Biasa saja… ini bisnes aa, kadang kadang baik, kadang kadang tada untung oo….”
“Biasalah hidup. Kadang kadang ok, kadang kadang tak ok.” You give Ah Kau a pat on the back. You smile and walk away and get into your car. You start the engine and start driving to your office, a multinational semiconductor company located in a premier industrial area. You are a young and promising finance executive and the future looks bright for you.
A year goes by and things look pretty good on the track. You decide to marry your fiance and have your new wife moves in to your place. Both of you feel happy because you can save more money as the two of you will be sharing one apartment and can live as one.
Ah Kau is still selling the newspaper as usual. Sometimes in the morning your wife gets the newspaper from Ah Kau instead of you.
A year later a child comes along, and you decide to buy and move into a newly developed condominium just across the street. This place is bigger so it will be perfectly fit for the 3 of you. But since both of you are working, you decide to get a maid to take of the household and your kid.
By this time you’re offered a managerial job from another multinational; the remuneration package offered is much better in terms of the pay, contractual bonus, medical benefits, ESOS scheme and a few others which make it impossible for you to decline. So you join this company happily.
You get busier. You realize that you spend less and less time with your family. When your department is busy preparing for the next audit, your working hours become more and more ridiculous. Any internal issues arising in the office means you’ll be stuck in the office until 8 or 9 pm. Sometimes, during the weekend, you’ll spend your time in your office, buried under paper works and documentations, instead of taking your family for a walk in the park.
One morning, on your way to get your copy of The Star, you realized that Ah Kau is no longer in his stall. So is his rundown motorbike. Instead, there’s another young Chinese guy at the stall.
“What happen to Ah Kau?” You ask out of curiosity.
“Oh, he is still around, but he is no longer taking care of this stall as he has opened up a new grocery shop down town. I am running this newspaper stall for him.”
“Ok,” you smile. You feel happy for Ah Kau. “At last he manages to improve his life.”
Your normal life continues. A year passes by and at the end of your company’s fiscal year, you’re rewarded for your effort with a 5 months bonus pay-out by your employer. Wow. Now that is a very handsome reward. You feel your effort has been equally compensated. To celebrate, you decide that it’s time to trade your 5-year old Proton Wira to the latest Honda Civic model. It won’t be much a problem to you to get a loan scheme from the bank as your pay slip will provide you an easy gateway to access financial help from any bank.
One day, the hardest reality of life hits you right on the face. The company that you’ve been working for years announces that they’re moving their business to China for cost and competitive reason and has asked you to find a job somewhere else. “What?” You scream out cold. “I got a lot of liabilities on the card! Who’s gonna pay for my mortgage? My car? My credit card? My gym fees? My bills?” You yell like there’s no way out.
This is the first time you feel let down by your own employer. All your hard work seem to go up on the smoke. You feel sick. You now hate your company. On the way home, you stopped by at a mamak restaurant for a cup of teh tarik while pondering about your future. Alone.
Suddenly you saw this new, shiny BMW 3 series being parked nearby. And to your surprise, it was Ah Kau. Yes, Ah Kau who used to sell newspapers nearby your old apartment. “What happened to old Ah Kau?” You whisper to your self.
Ah Kau still recognizes you, and sit next to you, and shared his story.
To make it short, Ah Kau had accumulated his money from selling newspapers to open more stalls, one after another. Every new stall is run by his workers so that he focused on opening more and more stalls, which in turn give him more and more money. Over the years, he had accumulated enough cash to open up new grocery store while at the same time buying more assets to grow his wealth. And his current wealth and success is achieved without any loan or financial help from banks and other financial institutions.
There you go. That’s the story. While Ah Kau is set to become financially free, you’re back to where you’re started before. Ground zero.
Before leaving, Ah Kau gives you a familiar quote, “Biasalah hidup. Kadang kadang ok, kadang kadang tak ok.” He gives you a pat on the back and walks away.
In reality, if you’re observant enough, there are a lot of Ah Kaus out there, that you will see every day and every where you go. The names are different, but inside them is every character of Ah Kau. They might be Uncle Dorai, Ah Chong, Pak Abu, Makcik Gemuk, Pak Man nasi lemak or others.
They look to be struggling on the surface, but if you look carefully and compare with you life, many of them are living with little or no liabilities. They ride an old ‘kapcai’ bike. They live in an old rundown house. They don’t have credit card to swipe. They wear a 10-year old shirt and short. No new, shiny Toyota Harrier. In short, their living means are far below than yours. But what you don’t realize is that many of them can save more money than yours, and over the years generate enough money to expand their business, or invest in properties. Their asset columns are much thicker than that of yours.
So the next time you see Ah Kaus, never look down on them, and never under estimate them. Or else you’re up for a harsh reality lesson.


*Be Smart Choices

~Businessman and Fisherman~

getting update...
What do you really hope to achieve in life? Read this story and you
may find that what you are always hoping to achieve, you may be
already have it.

There was once an American businessman who was sitting by the beach in a small Mexican village. As he sat, he saw a Mexican fisherman rowing a small boat towards the shore and noticed that the fisherman has caught a quite number of big fishes that is known to be a delicacy.

The American was really impressed and ask the fisherman, "How long does it take you to catch so many fishes?"

The fisherman reply; "Oh, just a short while."

"Then why don't you stay longer at sea and you could catch even more? The businessman was astonished.

The fisherman simply does not agree, "This is enough to feed my whole family?" he says.

The businessman then asked: "So, what do you do for the rest of the day then?"

The fisherman reply; "Well, I usually wake up early in the morning, go out to sea and catch a few fishes, then I would go back and play with my kids. In the afternoon, I will take a nap with my wife, and evening comes, I will join my buddies in the village for a drink, we played guitar, sing and dance throughout the night. My day was ever so complete and carefree."

The businessman does not agree with his way of life and offered a
suggestion to the fisherman.

"I am a PhD holder graduated from Harvard University, specialises in business management. I could help you to become a more successful person.
From now on, you have to spend more time at sea and try to catch as many fishes as possible. And when you have save enough money, you could buy a bigger boat and catch even more fishes. As you go on, you will be able to afford to buy more boats, recruit more fishermen and lead a team of your own. Soon you will be able to set-up your own company, your very own production plant for canned food and do direct selling to your distributors.At that time, you will have moved out of this village and to Mexico city, and then expand your operation to LA, and finally to New York city, where you can set-up your HQ to manage all your other branches."

The fisherman asks, "So, how long would that take? "

The businessman reply: "About 15 to 20 years"

The fisherman continued, "And after that?"

The businessman laugh heartily, "After that, you can live like a king
in your own house, and when the time is right, you can go public and float your shares in the Stock Exchange, by then you will be rich, your income will be coming in by the millions!!"

The fisherman ask, "And after that?"

The businessman says "After that, you can finally retire, you can move to a house by the fishing village, wake up early in the morning and catch a few fishes, then return home to play with the kids, have a nice afternoon nap with your wife, and when evening comes, you can join your buddies for a drink, play the guitar, sing and dance throughout the night!! "

The fisherman was puzzled, "Isn't that what I am doing now??"

So, what does one really hope to achieve in life, do we really need to work so hard in life ? What do you hope to accomplish in the end ?